The Priesthood of all Believers

Been struggling with this concept of late. In this, my self-imposed exile from regular church attendance, intentional effort to listen and hear where God is leading, here in the quiet. There are a few passages in scripture that speak to the responsibility of all believers to take up the mantle of priesthood -- a holy nation-- a royal priesthood-- chosen -- living stones rejected by men (humans) but chosen by God and on and on and on. Somehow, though, this has not been the way the church structure is built. We talk about it. We promote it. We study it in scripture and we preach about it, but we build up organizational structures that are antithetical to these precepts. I'm as guilty as any having bought into the structure. Granted, I had help.

On my second "attempt" toward ordination, though I was a part of the ministry team, where I was on the preaching rotation, I preached, I taught, I prayed etc., but during communion, I was forbidden to stand in a certain place, or to assist with serving the elements of bread and wine because I was not ordained. On my third "attempt" toward ordination (different denomination this time) I served in any manner I was called on, preaching, teaching, praying etc., including assisting with serving the elements. Actually, upon reflection, I was doing all of that before I attempted the third attempt. The one thing that was really considered above my pay grade was the "blessing of the elements", which for you non-churchy types, is the prayer that is said over the bread and wine which consecrates it and makes it .... holy. Pretty sure, after typing that, that I don't have the correct level of reverence for this as I should. Probably why my "third attempt" at ordination failed-- because I lack the proper amount of reverence. But that's for another posting. And yeah, I realize there's some snark in there.

In the last month, I've been asked to preside over a memorial service; I've been asked if I would preside over a wedding, I've been asked to deliver the prayer, because "you're a minister, right?" I froze, sort of like that proverbial deer in headlights. I didn't know what to say. While noting that my heart was pounding, I explained that I was not ordained, but that I would be happy to -- help--pray--assist-- in whatever manner needed. My heart pounds still while recalling these moments.

So, circling back to the title of this post, and the reason actually for this blog--- hearing God's voice, following where God leads, discerning the fullness of this journey I've been on for the past 16 years. I believed, because I was taught to believe that the way to serve God in an "official" capacity was to become ordained. On that journey there have been three definitive attempts to do just that. The first attempt was halted because of a life change that resulted in a move from one state to another. The second attempt was halted due to a supernatural intervention -- can't call it anything else, the third attempt was halted via committee. Because I'm a total believer in a supernatural God, I have to now know that this experience, taken in total, is purposeful for what God is calling me to. For whatever reason, these experiences were necessary for me to come to the end of all that I know, or thought I knew, and for me to now lean on the Holy Spirit to lead, guide, reveal, enlighten and ..... dispatch.

Speak Lord. Your servant is listening.